DEATH OF A "PARENT"

I've talked here before about disenfranchised grievers (refer to my October 19, 2011 post about grieving for an ex-spouse).  These are grievers not recognized by society, for one reason or another, and I am one of those.  I have been with my Signficant Other (otherwise known as my SO) for over 10 years now, happily unmarried.  Unfortunately, there is no term for middle aged couples, who are together, but not married.  "Girlfriend" is too young; "Significant other" is a mouthful;
"Lover" is too personal; "Spousal equivalent" is lame, etc. etc.  So........ when his dad died suddenly last week, much to his mother's dismay, I was not mentioned in the obituary with all of the other family members (how adorable that this woman who just became a widow worried a single second about this issue!!)  Truly, I was not upset.  I told her that I am not a member of the family, altho I have always been made to feel as if I am!  (My SO's family is absolutely awesome, in every way!)  My SO's ex-wife was also at the funeral, because she has maintained a good relationship with his family (I told you his family was amazing!)  She, being an ex-spouse, is also a disenfranchised griever.  But the death of a man that we ALL knew and loved brought us together, not only to grieve, but to honor his life and his name.  No label is necessary.  Rest in peace, Jack.