I was watching the national evening news the night that Elizabeth Edwards died. Diane Sawyer read some quotes that were so beautiful that I jumped up and got a pen and paper to write them all down. As a bereavement specialist, these really hit home with me. I hope they will with everyone who happens to read this blog, also.
In her own voice, Ms. Edwards quoted lyrics from a Leonard Cohen song, called Anthem. She never wallowed in her misfortune, but always looked at the glass half full. She knew she still had so much to live for and she was determined to do so.
"Ring the bells that still can ring.
Forget your perfect offering.
There's a crack in everything.
That's how the light gets in."
This second quote is a great one for all of us to remember. I know that when a loved one has died, people are reticent to talk about that person, for fear that it will make the griever tearful; therefore, they never mention the deceased. Elizabeth says (from experience, since her son died at 16), "To not bring up the deceased, because you think it will make someone sad, know that they [the griever] didn't forget they died. You are not reminding them. You ARE reminding them that they lived and that is a great, great gift." And at this time of year, when so much {undue} emphasis is on gift giving, what easier and more poignant gift to give than that of remembering that someone lived and will not be forgotten?!
Last, but not least, Elizabeth talked about leaving her children: "I do know when they are older and telling their children about their grandmother, they will be able to say that she stood in the storm, and when the wind did not blow her way-and it surely has not!- she adjusted her sails."
Rest in peace, Elizabeth.
You've cried at weddings, right? At the birth of a baby? And, of course, you've probably cried at funerals, but have you ever stopped to wonder why both happy and sad events, make you so emotional? Even worse, do you often feel like you're the only one? I will impart wisdom gleaned from professional conferences, seminars, books and articles and/or I will blog my personal thoughts. Either way, I hope you check in often, so you know that your tears are never shed in a vacuum!
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
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About Me
- Ms. Baby Boomer-dang
- Dallas, TX, United States
- I am an educator and consultant, in the field of loss and grief. I love educating others, as well as learning from them, about life's little and big, happy and sad losses: marriage, divorce, moving away, losing one's health, aging gracefully.....or not......death of a loved one, a pet, a dream, children growing up and parents having to let go, etc. etc. Hopefully, you get the picture. Let's laugh, cry and learn together!
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