If truth be told, I could write a year's worth of blogs, concerning this single topic of what NOT to say to a griever. Because we live in such a death denying society, no one wants to actually learn what to say, because that would bring the topic of death out in the open! So, when someone we know has suffered from a major loss, the first, and most common, statement said is, "I don't know what to say to him/her." Well, here's something to remember, that will help you in these situations, from the lips of Elizabeth Edwards, after the death of her 16 year old son:
"So many people, thinking they were taking care of me, asked if I was over Wade's death yet. I will never be 'over' it, I would tell them, and they would look back at me blankly. If I had lost a leg, I would tell them, instead of a boy, no one would ever ask me if I was 'over' it. They would ask how I was doing learning to walk without my leg. I was learning to walk and to breathe and to live without Wade."
You've cried at weddings, right? At the birth of a baby? And, of course, you've probably cried at funerals, but have you ever stopped to wonder why both happy and sad events, make you so emotional? Even worse, do you often feel like you're the only one? I will impart wisdom gleaned from professional conferences, seminars, books and articles and/or I will blog my personal thoughts. Either way, I hope you check in often, so you know that your tears are never shed in a vacuum!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
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About Me
- Ms. Baby Boomer-dang
- Dallas, TX, United States
- I am an educator and consultant, in the field of loss and grief. I love educating others, as well as learning from them, about life's little and big, happy and sad losses: marriage, divorce, moving away, losing one's health, aging gracefully.....or not......death of a loved one, a pet, a dream, children growing up and parents having to let go, etc. etc. Hopefully, you get the picture. Let's laugh, cry and learn together!
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