CHANGING THE LANGUAGE OF GRIEF

I attended a local grief seminar a couple of months ago and Darcie Sims, a well known presenter in our field, offered us different ways of looking and speaking about grief, that I thought were quite interesting. It might take some effort to change how we normally talk about grief, but it will definitely be more effective and worth the effort.
1.  Instead of using the word, "denial," why not use the word, "postponement?"  Denial imposes judgment, whereas postponement means you're just not ready to deal with it yet.
2. "Acceptance" is a difficult term for any griever.  "Acknowledge" might be easier and more honest.
3. Instead of saying, "We lost him/her," just come right out and say, "He/she died."  It's more to the point and has less a feeling of hopelessness about it.
4. A griever doesn't really "recover."  He/she "heals."
5. Have you ever heard people ask grievers, "When do you think you'll be over it?"  We NEVER get over it!  We "get through" it and move on.
6. As I stated in an earlier column, you close on a house, not on a death.  Instead of the word, "closure," try thinking "reconnection."  Reconnect with life.