I have had the same dilemma. I was born and raised in Ohio, but only 4 years after graduating college, I moved away, never to return except for visits. I loved living there, when I did, but that is not home to me and hasn't been for a very long time. When did I stop calling Ohio home? I honestly don't remember, but I do know that it's been many, many years.
When I do return for reunions or infrequent visits, I miss it so. I miss the trees, my siblings and friends, the house in which I grew up, the old familiar neighborhoods, all my schools from elementary through high school, and what I think I especially miss is my youth and all the fabulous memories that came with my first 21 years.
I wonder what my kids think when they come back to Texas? Although neither child was born here, we moved here when they were babies. (There's a Texas saying: "I wasn't born here, but I got here as fast as I could!" That would be us!) Unlike myself, they went far away to summer camp every year, from the time they were 11 years old. Then, they both went out of state to college, so they had lots more opportunities to leave home, before they officially left home, if you get my drift!
Now, they both live on opposite coasts of the USA with we parents in the middle. Their professions are thriving, which is awesome, but that also means that it would be difficult for either one to ever come back to Texas to settle down permanently. It's not out of the question, because we all talk about it alot, but it's not likely in the near future, if at all. I sometimes ask myself, "Why did we send them away to camp and to college and to Israel, Spain and Italy (where they lived for short periods of time)? Did we make them so independent that they don't feel the need to come back to Texas?" But then, I stop and realize, "Hey! I never went back home, either!"
It's all a part of growing up. I'll never forget something that I read years ago about parenting: "The goal of parenting is to work yourself out of a job." I did. We did. We raised them both to be independent, intelligent, caring and sensitive individuals. As fun as they were to nurture on a daily basis, now, although not daily or at home, they are just as much fun to interact with as young adults. Oh, the conversations that we get into! Talk about independent! We can't even broach the subject of politics! But their independent ways of thinking and living make me proud as a peacock!
Even though they may never come back to Texas to live permanently, I do know that they will always take home with them in their hearts and souls, wherever they may be, just as I have and always will.
Happy sad tears!